February 20, 2004



GUILTY AS CHARGED: UNGRATEFUL


I am guilty as charged for being ungrateful just as many of us are. We forget the happy times and are angry, resentful, or sadly nostalgic for what was or what might have been instead of being grateful for the blessed happiness that the hope or the occasion brought. Why throw away what was blessed, beautiful, trusting or great because events in the present disprove your dream. Be happy for what you had whether it was material, emotional, physical or ephemeral. You had it. It brought you happiness. Because it no longer brings you happiness is no reason to wash away the past feelings of gladness. Hold on to what it would be if it came to fruition.

Pleasant emotions arise from attitudes as do unpleasant ones. Therefore stay with the beauty. If someone sends us a bouquet of flowers, do you get angry when they wilt and die? Does that erase the former pleasure of knowing someone thought of you? Much in life is memories similar to that metaphor. We can choose to keep the exciting memoirs and throw away the bad instead of the reverse. As long as we have a constructive attitude we can accomplish our aims.

I read a true article in Readers Digest many years ago. It told about how men in a life raft rowed way beyond any man’s capabilities because they willed themselves to live and found they had the strength to persevere. There are also many other examples of Will over bodily reactions. Doctors know that patients outlive their expectation when they refuse to die. Victims were kept alive on the thin ray of hope through journals (unless of course they were forced into gas chambers).

It is the bitterness we hold that defeats us, not life. Life can not defeat us if we confront it as one would a battle and determine that you will win with cheerfulness. For what we transfer to our brain is all that the brain knows. What messages we feed the brain it acts upon. Tell yourself you will prevail and suddenly you find yourself on the road to healing. Otherwise we eat ourselves up with what may or may not happen. We wonder if it is going to happen, WHEN will it happen?

Make each day interesting and productive. Each day, balance your work with some enjoyable activities. Then the ecstasy will happen and perhaps your silent wishes will come true also. Go over your benefits. If you are reading this, you are alive. Be grateful. If your health is good be grateful. If not, devise a plan to improve it. In all likelihood you own a car and have a roof over your head which implies that you have electricity, water, heat and in some cases AC. Others in the third world countries don’t have any of these luxuries. In some areas people must go many miles just for drinking water or pay large sums for the privilege. Do you have healthy intelligent children? If not contact the government agencies that will assist you to get the proper help. Imagine only a telephone call away there is aid. Iraqis do not have a working government to call on for any of the above services. On Long Island we have beautiful homes, lawns and gardens. We don’t have to own one to enjoy the beauty of our neighbors yard. Beauty is all around us. Look up at the sun, the formations of clouds in the sky. Even the seasons give us variety in our life. We can hardly get bored. Find a project to help others or that you are passionate about. Get a loan if necessary to get started or to clean up your bills into one comprehensive and cheaper whole with lower interest rates than you are previously planning. Stop brooding!

Take action! Be grateful and suddenly you will begin to feel that life is worth the trip once more. It only takes the determination to make that switch inside your head to go from stop to start. Amazingly all the troubles begin to drop away. I know. I do it whenever I begin to feel sorry for myself. I make every day a GREAT day because I can and will make it that way! Turn the switch in your head and join me. HAVE A GREAT DAY. I KNOW YOU WILL.