May 28, 2004
May 28, 2004


THE SECRET OF ANTICIPATION


Anticipation works to eliminate boredom and/or loneliness. I recall one time telephoning for a Broadway ticket and being told “You're in luck we have one for this Saturday!” I was deflated, ”Can’t I get one for a month or two later?” The salesperson was surprised and wondered aloud why I did not want immediate gratification. I stated, ”Anticipation is greater than realization. It is more fun thinking about how much fun I am going to have. I don’t want that cut short to just a few days.”

The secret of anticipation works well to mend marriages. For straying spouses who want to be loyal I am asked, “How do you forget a loved one that no longer wants you or you should not have because you or the other person is already married?” Use anticipation. When a person is involved in an expected love union, s/he anticipates what will happen. That anticipation brings pleasure. Yet anticipation is merely a thought, imagination, and illusion of what you expect life to be, not what the event will eventually be (the present moment might be as you desire it).

Anticipation works well for any type of addictive behavior, including using drugs. Break down how you might build a scenario in your mind of what you feel the high will be. Then be aware of what actually happens after the high: a fog that obliterates your surroundings. Look, taste, touch, hear and smell your environment starting with experiencing your bodily movements as you walk. Really look at the color of the grass, the texture of the tress, and be aware of the mole, the rabbit, the squirrel, the children laughing and cavorting about. Take the time to LIVE.

The components of anticipation are longing, constant remembrances of expected pleasurable times which creates a tension of happiness. It is the tension, the insecurity of not being certain that your wishes will be materialized in some form or other that actually adds spice to our life. We dull it with a commitment that creates a false sense of security that we no longer have to put an effort into the event, relationship or whatever that leads to a boring sense of stagnation. Why not turn your rejected/unhappy or bored self toward anticipating other events such as traveling to exotic places. It doesn’t matter if you have the money for it or not. The dream is what is important. (Eventually you’ll find a way to act on your wishes.) Get travel catalogs from your nearest travel agency. Go to the library and obtain films, books, and/or magazines that pertain to areas that look exciting. Read about it. Dream about it, perhaps with your spouse who you have spurned for the other person. Eventually those dreams may be realized as you save or take local trips on the weekend. Changing your direction to a motivation that is fun can change your life. It can be working out, sports, movies, dances, hobbies, travel, reading, house projects or whatever you decide the experience that you enjoy should be and anticipate, anticipate, anticipate!